Welcome aboard, Thom.

The ride I had today was flat, on pavement and just on two kilometers return. It was also the best one I've ever done.

One New Thing (to obsess over).

My program of "Taking it to the next level" (you know, IT) kicked off in rather fine style today. My ride had all of the following.

3 hours
My SS. (TWO Niner as an American chap I know refers to it as)
Lots of up
Wet Roots/trail litter/pine needles
Some rather nice down
Up and down together in one convenient package
Climbing through mist
Fugazi (see title of previous post)
Walking up very steep bits with my bike (however not too many, of which I am happy)
Mud/Muddy puddles of unknown depth
Blood. Mine (a rather pathetic-tacular low speed oopsie, attempting to remount my bike after slipping on some wet roots on Old Chevy
1x One Square Meal (on ride out of Longmile)
Arm Warmers (it was unseasonably cold)

I now feel very tough. And I am only sore if I move, stay still, sit, stand or lay prone. I have found a new thing to obsess over.. wait for it... Are my Ergo Grips level!! Hurrah!!!!! ( I twisted one out of alignment when I fell on my ass today). Next up, collapsing on the couch in front of the mesmerotron to watch Storm Surfers and mull over my return to work after four sweet days off. Joy.

Oh, Good. He's On Another One Of His Fugazi Jags...

And all the better you are for it, motherfuckers.

Shut The Door.

Riding was canned today in favour of A) an impromptu swim in the lake B) Spending time with my mother who is in town for the day and C) Helping cook dinner. I will go on a shop ride one day, I will. I will.
Tomorrow morning will be the go, methinks. Not really winding self up about not riding today. Who am I kidding? I'm totally wound up about not riding. Good old obsessive Pete, the most insecure pirate to ever worry his way across the seven seas. The riding I have been doing ( which has been a fair bit) has been awesome, but with some events coming up in the next few months which I wish to do, I feel I have to 'Take things to the next level" and by that I mean "just on par" vs my normal state of "distinctly sub par". whew, I could use a red bull..

In other news, I just wrote a letter. An important letter. Things are (hopefully) looking up.

These men have pretty much been on repeat on my rides of late. Helps going up and helps going down....

In Salute Of.....Stones Horsley

Stones Horsley came to town again today. And I (yet again) missed him. It was a combination of a massive ride yesterday, coupled with the first of four days off family jobs, errands and child minding/bonding/catching up with duties. Stones Horsley you say? yes. Stones motherfucking Horsley!!.

I first met Stones Horsley at what I now know to be the last junction on Roller Coaster, before it heads down to the Chinese Menu. I heard him before I ever saw him.It was race one of this year's Winter Series and I was sucking down some space goo and wondering when the white spots would fade from my vision, when this blond chap squeaks up on this great mid 90's full sus GT, and enquired if I had any panadol. "no, no I don't" I reasonably replied, Stones let me know that he had buggered his back, I do believe we rode together for a while, then having blown my load within the first 10km Stones dropped me.

Second race of the Series, Stones again. I was a lot more prepared and trained, Stones' back was still sore, We rode together for a considerably longer distance, and then I dropped him.

Third race of the series, Not prepared at all. Rode together for most of race, then three quarters through I yet again blew up and you guessed it, he dropped me. I finished just behind him, and through my haze of pain, took his number, because "This guy is alright".

He is more than alright. The man is a true hessian, and has STONES.

We caught up a few times before I moved and trained together.Stones punishes bikes (cracks frames, breaks shocks) and punishes himself, Stones did the Highlander, (which was the weekend that my family moved to vegas) with less training than I personally would be comfortable, and on an unfamiliar hard tail. He came to my house afterward with his lovely lady, a fixed beatific smile and drank cola and cramped uncontrollably in my living room.

Was this enough for Stones? no.

Stones did the Whaka. Myself at this point having decided that my training was way off and that I would go all out in the half century, I kept getting messages from Stones, saying 'oh, should be training more, commuting 12km to work..um". I was dying for him. Less patronism,more truly concerned friend. The weekend before the Whaka, when I was enjoying a leisurely tool around the hills with Von Krosch Stones was down here as well (didn't catch up with him then either) punishing himself doing Direct Road repeats. Stones.

This is the bit that kills me. I shake my head in disbelief at the man's fortitude.
Stones did the Whaka, and got cut off at, I believe, the 90km mark. He was routed through the finish and then, in high dudgeon (because quite rightfully Stones was over the 10km hr average) rode another 10km BACK OUT to where he got cut off and rode the ADDITIONAL 10KM THAT HE HAD BEEN PREVENTED FROM DOING BACK TO THE FINISH. Fuck me.

That night, 110km done, same house, same smile, less cramp, more dinners.

So, before he flys out to the Northern Hemisphere to Ski over Christmas, raise your glasses everyone to Stones. He has a quieter, newer and less cracked bike now, and just txt me a list of the trails he rode today (read, Half the forest). A more cheerful, resolute and inspiring riding buddy you'd never hope to meet.

Guilford Falls.

Flagging on the riding this morning, then saw these. See you later.

A higher class of establishment

So, it would appear that I'm all out of stuff to say on my own blog, and have reduced to a Bike Satan-esque pattern of just posting music clips. Put me on Someone else's blog however and holy shizzle, it's verbal diarrhoea!!!

I, oh. There it is, thought blocking. Jeez. Not much on the bike this week, as am working a 7 day stretch, with daily commutes to Taupo.

Here's an even more elegant mash note to Mr Weir. make's mine seem clumsy by comparison. I would also recommend staying and perusing Dicky's blog. He can ride the good goddamn out of a bike.

James Murphy continues to rule. Even from years ago. ESPECIALLY FROM YEARS AGO

Night Destroyer

Perfect Day.

Sick Day. Bought Thom his first real bike, Long ride on the SS and then a swim/dive at the blue lake. Save for the Melancholy on my part (long, hard year) a nearly perfect day.

Folk Implosion

I have come to realize that as a bass player I pretty much just ripped Lou Barlow off completely. No bad thing, I guess....

Sick Sick Sick

I'm sick and grumpy. Passed up the opportunity to ride today to rest. Rest. I know it's good for me, but now I'm regretting it. I do get uptight about these things though...Children also sick. Wife frustrated with same. mint.

Spork Fight '08.

I brought my Spoon to a Spork fight this afternoon with Matt K and some of his other Carbon Spork riding buddies. I had simply my spoon, my lovely green, rigid steel spoon. It went rather well, thank you.

I remain, stoked on the 90's.

Right You Are

Hubris/The Eternal Battle Rages On.

Hubris, sometimes spelled hybris (ancient Greek ὕβρις), is a term used in modern English to indicate overweening pride, self-confidence, superciliousness, or arrogance, often resulting in fatal retribution www.wikipedia.org

So, Yeah. I shot out of the end of A-Trail yesterday onto Tickler. Really enjoying my new ride, I saw a few Riders on Full Suspension rides ahead and wondered how fast I could push it. I caught them comfortably, and as we descended into Tickler one word flashed into my head, "HUBRIS"

I pushed it out of my head, I wasn't even pushing it hard. No I'm just riding here. I passed the last two guys around a wide corner with a smug "cheers guys", my front wheel slipped on a wet rock, skewing the bike across the track, I remained upright, however I was up out of the pedals, both feet ejected and my testicles came into a grinding impact with my seat. The battle was decided. SCROTUM:0 SEAT:1

All was not lost however as I stayed upright and carried on, vomiting into my mouth as I lurched up the track. Coulda been worse, however I guess it was a lesson learned (or completely arbitrary, In fact, I don't know what the lesson that I might have learnt was? Don't try and pass people? I don't know.. )It took a good half hour for the pain to subside. ah, testicle pain. what a thing eh?

Old Chevy was made for Single Speeds, but. Great, Great trail...

HYPE!!!!

I have not been up to writing, Life has been getting in the way (in a non fringe-emo way, just been busy is all) Will get there.

Look what I have..


It's been a whole new experience, a joyful one at that.

The family is back in Dorkland for the the week, so I am flying solo. (read: working, riding, reading)

Anyone remember the movie, HYPE!? Here are some favourite moments of mine...

Run To The Bubbles, Bitches.

Come for the windmill and bubbles, stay for the Sit ups.

My New Favourite Thing.

Following up my stumbling quasi political spew from yesterday was going to be a posting of the new President Elect's victory speech.

Then I saw this.



I have to know more....

Juice it Chuck!!!

Gallop Gallop Gallop...

The Mojo Men are coming! The Mojo Men are coming!!

Lock up your red anodized components and Chris King hubs...

This Album rules

All Go No Flow...

I got the rubber dirt side down for the first time in about ten days today.. not to say that I haven't been riding, I have, a bunch. commuting to and fro for the agony of a morning shift. I had a whole heap of fun, and did one of my favourite loops, plus some. It was great fitness wise, but I just didn't feel "The Flow" if you will. There were no major catastrophes or anything, but things just weren't gelling as well.My trail craft was slightly off.. It's real interesting (to me, anyway) that after not being out on the trails for that short time I had begun to lose my steez. Or maybe it was one of those days..I dunno.

I met two very nice people from the US of A at the direct road junction. They were riding motel hire bike specials, new to riding trails and wondering if "cruising up Frontal Lobotomy" (it's grade 2 right?)would get them views of the lake. Is that uphill? A short re evaluation later and they tootled off down Pipeline Rd to the benign goodness of Tahi and the Creek Track

Most, if not all of the people I have met from the US have been thoroughly wonderful. And it catches me out just how different these people are from myself, a New Zealander, I guess the thing that catches me out is because like me, they are white and speak the same language..However unlike me, they grew up in a completely different culture.I dunno if this is gelling, however I was thinking on the ride how glad I am to be alive in a time of such historical significance, the US Election tomorrow is one of the most significant in history...The potential of an African American man in the White House? When I was 5, in 1982 who would have ever thought that could be a possibility?.

I lean firmly to the left, so I would vote for Obama (heard of him??)if I was able, however I'm not going to lauch into some rant about McCain or anything as it's not my country and I don't have a say...

But I did get sent this little link here today, and I think it's interesting to see what would happen if the World Could Vote

And ending this clumsy political entry, as glad as I am to be living in this time I'm also terrified for my future and those of my children. The world is teetering on the verge of falling on it's ass as it is, and it frightens the shit out of me that the outcome of the US election could send us down a path were conquest, totalitarianism and unilateralism may be high on the agenda.When America sneezes the world catches the cold. Good Luck, Barry.

Mini M&M's as the Rotorua Xanax? Discuss....

Right, I've calmed down. onto business...
Let's talk about super humanity.

Example The First

Example The Second

Example The Third

That is some next level shit right there...

I want to try CX. Gin and tromobones ahoy..



On the riding front I've been getting 40km round trip to work most days. some on pavement, some on fire road, however I haven't hit the trails for a good week or so. Tuesday is the day. Summer Cup here I come.

and now, randomly..

Three Golden Rules...

I'm a Mental Health Nurse. I'm fucking proud of my job, I love it and I do it well. We're supposed to help people and do. Yes there is massive room for improvement in the mental health services and yes, mistakes do happen. But believe it or not we do help, we do the jobs that most people couldn't and we do make a difference.

Then there is THIS GUY. Way to disgrace my profession, man...

I've had the misfortune to work with old Ian. Both at ADHB and WDHB. Ian always appeared out of his depth, an anxious man who would cover his anxiety with bravado.I'm not sure we got on that well, in fact, I disliked him, and I'm pretty sure he disliked me. I moved into a crisis team when he was still in ICU and then I understand the wheels fell off.. However, did I trust Ian to have my back? Yes.. have I been in a few scrapes with Ian? Yes. Could I work with him on a professional level? yes. Had I the (not unreasonable)assumption that he had a basic grasp of ethics, morals and boundaries? yes. I had no clue that things could be so wrong in the man's head that he could stoop so low.

I've also worked rather extensively with the "vulnerable Woman" in the past, and I find it INCOMPREHENSIBLE that anyone. ANYONE could think that with her level of "Vulnerability" that a sexual relationship with a man who nursed her could be anything other than abusive, immoral and unethical. Nice one. GGRRRRRR. I've lost my train of thought. I can even put a sentence together....HOW DARE YOU?. shame on you, Ian. Shame on you.

Postgraduate course in ethics? how about breaking it down a little bit simpler for ol' Ian... Here you go man, three golden rules. Write em' down a hundred times...Genius

DON'T HIT THEM DON'T STEAL FROM THEM DON'T FUCK THEM

Outed On Halloween

I was saving this as a surprise... however the only person who reads my blog "outed" me in his. Bitch.

I am almost apoplectically excited, however. I figure if I'm going to suck at something, I might as well suck at something hard. Anyone know of anyone who makes a seat post in 26.8??

Happy Halloween.

Got The Suburban Dorkland Getting Me Down Blues.

I'm homesick. For Rotorua.
My new nephew rules, but.
Rain Rain Go Away.

A Cameo/Other Blogs That Rule Hard(er than mine). Part Two.

Girl Lightning showed up today and took my step ladder. She brought back my stepladder and also some beers for me. Thanks Girl Lightning! It was cold and dark on the commute in and cold and sunny on the way home. go figure the Vegas spring.

And now,ahem, it's time for Other Blogs That Rule Hard(er than mine) Part two where we look at events...

Kittens

The Soil Saloon

Gravel

There above be my kind of events....

You ever get to 3rd bass?

A Peter Gabriel sample, Ferrets, an MC named Pete Nice and Cameos by Jello Biafra and Henry Rollins (as Vanilla Ice). Damn.

Other Blogs That Rule Hard(er than mine). Part One.

The Snot Rocket

Top Five That Keep Me Alive, Clive.

Completely unbidden, a Txt message from Von Krosch arrived on my phone today. It said, simply... Top 5 Albums?
Normally this would be enough to throw me into a complete spin, however being the zen master I am I simply centred myself emptied my mind of all intrusive thoughts and vowed that I would list the first five albums that flew into my consciousness.

Accordingly and in all it's glory I give you..

Fugazi- In on the Kill Taker
Released June 1993 on Dischord Records

My favourite record from my favourite band of all time. My heartbreak/triumph album. enough said.



Weezer- Pinkerton
Released October 1996 on Geffen Records

This easily outstrips anything that Rivers Cuomo ever did before or after.Critically acclaimed, yet maligned by the man who wrote it. Named after the Lead Male in Madame Butterfly and filled with self loathing, sexual urges and huge shitty drums. I'm Jello baby.



Refused- The Shape of Punk To Come
Released October 1998 on Burning Heart Records

This album makes me want to yell very loudly and jump out of windows. superfluous.Refused are fucking dead? more's the pity...



Queens Of The Stone Age- Rated R
Released June 2000 on Interscope Records.

Drugs. Fucking. Monsters. Judas Priest. Summer. Beer. Parasols. James Duncan.




The Bees- Sunshine Hits Me
Released March 2002 on We Love You

I remember driving around in my Hyundai Crying because I had heard the song "angry man" on the radio and thought it was the lead out single of another Auckland Band. I thought, "that's it, we're done". Lucky for me, eh? This album is beautiful. It reminds me of Kingsland, Jim the trombone player and most importantly, my wife. I lovity love love love this record. mmmm. I note that the below is the original of A Menha Menina (My Girl) by Os Mutantes which is covered on the album. It too, totally rules.

Root Beer Float

Black Cat Bicycles

Yummy.

Tyson Collins

I'm an uncle again! An uncle to a strapping 10lb something boy named Tyson Collins.
Awesome! Have yet to speak to my sister however I'm assured that she is doing well.
Must have been all baby and no milky bar, eh Kate?

I Win!! Not Sure What Or Why, But I Won!

FIGHT!!!

So Long Old Bean..

My numero uno Riding Shorts have finally bit the dust after nigh on three years of heavy use. a small tear happened in the inner thigh, then that hole got hooked up on my seat. yaddah yaddah yaddah I need some new shorts. I loved my old shorts. We went through a lot together, saw lots of sights, rode lots of Kms, some great events and tonnes of very good times. sigh.

I hit out today and timed my ride perfectly. It rained the entire time I was on the bike. I wore my pair of these.. I bought them to do the whaka 100 in, didn't end up doing it and so havn't worn them in anger. I don't think I've ever been more comfortable on a bike in inclement weather. coupled with This Guy up top I was sitting pretty.Lovely. Realistically think I prolly looked like a sack of cookie dough tied in the middle with wire, but meh. I had a great ride.. was that a product reveiw? jeez

I changed my stem. who would have thought that 20 stinking ml and five less degree of raise would make all the difference?? I certainly didn't, stinking neophyte that I am. I do now though. I like being faster and less terrified.

Tandem Cyclocross is the future

Push Bikes are so so beautiful

Oh yes, they certainly are

Dear Science is vying for my record of the year. I listened to it three times back to back on the trails yesterday. It really is something special.

Bigger Better Bushier.

My Credo for 2007 was "ADULT SHOES"

This year's would have to be "TIDY HAIR MESSY BEARD"



My significantly better half is a very understanding woman. As with everything I do, it's evidence based all the way. GO HERE

Also, I aint no fixie but I am a fan of this guy. Check out the new site affiliated with Swobo

Guys Who Cut Their Own Hair

Linkriffic!!

Hey Jackboot Fuck Your War

This from the Herald.

American dad names baby after Republican campaign
10:56AM Thursday Oct 16, 2008
By Eveline Jenkin

A baby in Tennessee has been named Sarah McCain Palin Ciptak by her father.
When Tennessee couple Mark and Layla Ciptak had a baby girl late last week they agreed to call her Ava Grace.

But Mrs Ciptak was in for a surprise come Monday morning, when she discovered her husband had instead registered their daughter with the moniker Sarah McCain Palin Ciptak.

Mr Ciptak told the Kingsport Times-News he picked the name to bring attention to the political candidates he supported - something he was able to do without his wife's knowledge as they had both already signed two sets of blank birth certification documents.

Mrs Ciptak first learned of her daughter's registered name when the Kingsport Times-News contacted her husband after receiving a routine birth announcement notification from the hospital where the baby was born.

"To be sure, she (Mrs Ciptak) was not quite fond of me or of what I had done, but we've had some time to talk it over, and she has been really supportive through it all," said Mr Ciptak.

What this father hadn't expected was the extent of the media frenzy surrounding his decision.

He's had calls from NBC, Fox News, the New York Post and Entertainment Tonight since the story broke.

"I Googled my name late Monday and two hits came up. I did it this morning and it popped up thousands of times," he told the Kingsport Times-News on Tuesday.

But Mr Ciptak says he does not regret his decision as it has had the effect he desired.

"That's what it was all about, to get the word out, to be encouraging, and to be a breath of fresh air to the McCain camp and that ticket. It seems to have taken off," he said.

Under Tennessee law, the name on a birth certificate can be changed within a year provided an affidavit is filed with the Department of Health's Office of Vital Records.

Mr Ciptak says he and his wife - who have two other children named Annika and Isaiah - are yet to decide whether they will officially change their baby daughter's name to Ava Grace.

Good God. What would the equivilent be in NZ? "John Bill English Key MIddle New Zealand"? "Winston Jerry Some-Of-My-Best-Friends-Are-Maori-Forget-About-The-Treaty Brownlee"?? Lord almighty..

Dear Science. Goodness me. Goodness Goodness Goodness me. Guaranteed to awesome up your ride by at least 150% or your money back.

A Blue Funk

Every time I would do something cool with music, the next week when life would return to "normal" (Read: Eating baked beans in Sunnyvale) my mood would plummet and I'd generally sulk around for the rest of the week. Who woulda thought that this would happen with riding bikes...

Saturday before last had me waking up and going "fifty Km huh? really?". Living here and doing events here make for a whole lot more relaxing experience. I felt relaxed, maybe too relaxed as I made my way to the start. I started from DFL, as A) there were some hot-shot-shaved-leg-bike-as-scalpel-heart-attack-serious ATHLETES on the start line and B) "Fifty Km Huh? Really?". IT was choice though.. Excellent actually. Great ride, Picked some people off, lots of good ups and choice choice downs. I've totally made up with Billy T.The Hundred Km guys and girls have my undying respect...Shouldn't I be the one giving you guys kind words of encouragement?

I busted my bunghole and finished in 3.55, average I know, considering the last time I rode a 50 ( In July) I finished in 4.48 I feel pretty pleased about this...

and now, in finishing up this b minus post I'll leave you with this little gem from Seasame St. Back when the muppets sounded right. So much for Jim Henson's "wait and see attitude".



I'm tired. Having a test ride tomorrow. Nervous.

Babadah Boopy!

Paranoid with a capital "what the fuck are you looking at, ian????"

I wanted to go for a pre ride today, but was ambivilant. I swing back and forth between riding and not riding the week before an event. I decided to let my inner Magic Eight Ball decide. If I lie on the couch for four minutes in the sun and feel agitated I will ride. If not I will rest. Hello an hour later. I'm a poor day sleeper. Poor Poor Poor Poor. My post day sleep routine usually involves an hour or so of stumbling around the house glaring suspiciously at the cats. Pity my family. Pity them..

Ever had a BBQ like this?

Von Krosch's Flying Circus

That was the best two day tear with a riding buddy ever. Bagels, Riding, Music, Hot Pools. To Paraphrase Dr Kinevell; I'd rather spend four hours in the woods with my (Considerably smaller) friend, shooting shit and learning about life than I would getting (not so)rad with a bunch of Jocks (with blue rims). Thanks Matt.

A Change of Focus

I've decided that with a body type that is better served packing down a scrum rather than blasting up a switchback that I need a change of focus, a new outlet if you will.
I've decided to become a luchedore

I must admit I'm a bit nervous,so I'd thought I'd try to live for a day with the mask and cape (Note, I did what I could, do you know how difficult it is to obtain a Lucha Libre full face mask at the Rotorua Markets?)

Accordingly....El Gordo!!!!!!!!!!

Gilette(sic) Moment?

I guess there are several "First Times" that stand out in a man's life... First Shave, First Kiss, First "Liaison", First time becoming a father etc etc.

I would like to add to that very special precious list "First time your shoe unclipps from your cleat when you are in mid air and travelling rather fast, causing your leg to raise from the bike and take position at a 90 degrees from the bike...like one fat wing"

I'd much rather hug my dad at a wedding than do that..

In Praise Of Sunshine Hit Me And Soba Violence

I was going to write about the great training ride I had yesterday, how I've entered the half century next week not the full and then expouse the virtues of four summertime albums by The Bees, Okkervil River, The Beastie Boys and Zero Zero but I just took the family to eat here and damn it all if I don't need a lie down. food-riffic. Ride more tomorrow. Redux soon.

I Was A Sunny Rainphase

There is a myriad of little reasons why I love Rotorua.

One of the main ones at the moment is that you can pick up a Stereolab album for 7.95 in the SUPERMARKET!!!



I also note that our house is sans For Sale sign and lock box from this afternoon. Double Bonus.

All About Eating Bugs.

I'm a total creature of comfort. For example, if I got lost on the trails and had eaten my last One Square,I certainly couldn't do this....



However, this Gentleman's argument is by far more persuasive

Fictitious Disorder Blues.

Something is amiss, someone is telling WHOPPING lies to us about our rented house, I meanSUPER WHOPPERS, almost appearing to be verging on delusional intensity, however it does appear that the house has not been sold. joy.

I'm not going to to the 100km as A) It's such a long way and B) I haven't been riding every day for hours and hours ergo C)it would kill me, or leave me permanently disabled/traumatized. If I was to do this I'd want to do it well, so 2009, here's looking at you kid. I will be doing the 50km though.

Mud Mud Muddy May Suggins Mud. it was muddy on the trails today, had a quick blast before picking up the boy from Kindergarten..I've started riding to work again in the mornings, to get some road miles in before October and the 50km. The plan is to cut back through the forest on the way home and do some time on the fire roads,should be a blast. From the reception I've gotten at work, you'd think that Hannah's Bay was on the moon (And it way well be, If the moon was nine flat and butter smooth km from your place of work.

Matt K is coming to give 'er next weekend. So is Beagle Rob. And Steffan's bought a Heckler. A nice new black one with shiny things on it. Without a trace of irony, that couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.

Speaking of Husky dudes that rule.. Frank Black anyone?

Huntasaurus Burger.

Bacon
Steak
Meat Patty
Soft Egg
Cheese
Beetroot
Salad
Mayo
BBQ Sauce.

It's not all hot laps and protein shakes around here you know...

NO HIGH HAT? WHAAAAAAAA?

Good Times Bad Times..

I'm no tickle me emo..
I was talking in the last post about the Personal Restraint Course that I've just completed for Lakes DHB (and taken over the running of). Physical Restraint is a small and awful part of my job, I've not had to "go hands on" in four years now, which is awesome, preferring to use this and this.Thinking aboutthis quite a bit helps as well. Hell, I'm not ashamed to admit that I've done my fair share of this to avoid any rough stuff (well, sort of...I couldn't find a page entitled "Fast Talking"). I admit freely though, the thought of having to do anything like hold someone down again doesn't appeal at all...

In the post before last I realized that I broke the Internet with all the youtubery.
sorry to the 2 people that read this for that.. but there you go.

Matt K is having a fine old time riding the Day/Night Thriller this weekend for These Guys the importer of Santa Cruz and Ibis bikes in NZ. Hell, brother man even asked me to join the team for the weekend, since I live an hour away and am A) keen as tits on both SC and IBIS (and Matt K if we're being honest..) and B) hoping to become an Mojo owner real soon I was understandably thrilled to be asked and all... even if (especially if) it was in a reasonably last minute ring-in capacity. J-O-B requirements indicated that I stay in vegas for the weekend though, so I sadly had to pass.

I did get a ride in yesterday afternoon, and grovelled my broken ass around in the mud for a couple hours before turning all fire roadie and legging it back to the car.. Last evening was spent (and I shit you not) sitting under the stars in the redwoods watching a Troupe of Downs syndrome kids preform Maori Legends. It was a truly awesome (in so many ways) experience.

The House we're renting is still on the market you say? Looks like it's just had an offer put in on it? Even if we were told it was going to be taken off? Even if we've all but moved in? Even if I've talked to the landlady several times and it appears that she is lying straight to my face? sure is..Gonna make the next few weeks a bit interesting methinks. Leaving on a juvenile yet satisfying note, I love NWA, and this next here clip seems apt for so many reasons.

Hold Secure

Turns out it still takes 6 people considerable time to hold me down...

That was a good (hard) four days, and I still felt as sick and like crying afterwards as the first time I ever did this. Which is good, because It means I am a human being (still)

Parts of my job really really bite.

Twelve Hits That Give Me The Shits.(okay, Thirteen)

PRIMAL SCREAM. SWASTIKA EYES
Angry Paranoid Scottish ex junkies get rave on it circa 1997. With Mani on Bass. Genius



PAVEMENT. GROUNDED
I was lucky enough to see this band at the Powerstation in the late 90's. My favorite song off Wowie Zowie. They played it for the first encore. Like Devendra I was High, Happy and Free.



FUGAZI, DO YOU LIKE ME?
I'm an old romantic, Guy and Ian are (obviously) old romantics..That's why Fugazi and I get on so well...



JEFF TWEEDY. SUNKEN TREASURE
I love Wilco, I love a grand statement in a rock song, and I have also had periods in my life when I have felt A) Empty inside and B) thinking I was going mad. This song resonates somewhat..



THE BEASTIE BOYS. SABOTAGE
When He's not saving Tibet and slaying Buddhist ladies + being one of the clown jewish prince's of hip hop, Adam Yauch can play bass rather well, and this song is driven by said bass. Video ain't bad either..I saw them on this tour, it was a grand old time



LCD SOUNDSYSTEM. MOVEMENT
James Murphy brings it home for the husky brothers in music. James Murphy also thinks that bass is the best instrument and is pleasingly adonoidal when he sings. I'm a sucker for a hand clap pad and bored looking New Yorkers.



QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE. LOST ART OF KEEPING A SECRET
You can take "Whatever you do, don't tell anyone" so many different ways. Reminds me of hot summer nights, an art school girlfriend and drinking whiskey with James D. And who could forget Matt "If you take the A away from Auckland and replace it with F you get Fuckland" Forte? You gotta no respect!



BLOOD ON THE WALL.MARY SUSAN
I'm totally stoked on the 90's, so are they. This is also a relationship that works well.



TV ON THE RADIO. WOLF LIKE ME
Okay, I couldn't find New Health Rock on YouTube. African American's invented Rock and Roll. Period.



AUTOLUX. TURNSTILE BLUES.
Best recorded drums I've heard in a long while. Gazy vocals and at 54 seconds it sounds like the world's ending.



RADIOHEAD.THERE THERE.
Best song for being homesick on tour ever. See above comment re grand statements in rock. Kraut rock? Ya.



DEVENDRA BANHART. SHABOP SHALOM BABY
Neither of my parents are Jewish, But they did live in Israel for a while in the 70's. I've convinced myself this is how they met.



THE FLAMING LIPS.DO YOU REALIZE??

Our Wedding song. Really. Pretty much sums things up for me.

Of The Interconnectedness (sic) Of Things/Songs For The Ages/Hitting Drops/Good Chris Bad Chris/Best Idea We Ever Had...

Two days ago I embarked upon what I can honestly say was two hours of the most fun I have ever had on a Mountain Bike.. I'm really enjoying it here in Rotorua, The riding is heaps different from that which I am used to, I'm finding that my technical skills in climbing, descending and hitting drops and jumps (of the small to sissy variety)have caught up with my level of fitness (average to pretty okay for a wide boy) and enthusiasm ( Jack Russell Puppy very excited about something exciting). With these three things combined my rides have become easier, faster and much more enjoyable.. I've been getting out about every second day, and have been hitting some decent lengths of rides, however I'm having far too much fun to think about the last enduro at the minute, but that may change..we'll see.

My Most Excellent Man Matt K text me before I went out stating that he felt that Judith by A Perfect Circle was a "Song for the Ages".. and good God Damn I'd be inclined to agree with him.. That song takes me back many years, to living in a flat with other muso types, all of us captivated by the combination of Maynard Kennan's voice and images of the Bass Player wearing them high heels... Oh, Lord.. You can tie your hair back any day, Paz. It was enough to make a twenty five year old mad with desire...

Accordingly and in all it's glory...



Now, a while back I espoused the theory that I had fallen out of love with music, and that The Dirt bombs were one of my "gateway bands" back to being in love with it again.. Hell, I even had my research published in a Prominent Web Based Sciencetelific Journal

I'll tell you though, the first, the FIRST record that I listened to when I started listening to music was SUPERUNKNOWN It was a killer record when I was 17, and lo and behold it's a Killer album 13 years later.. Perfect for some nice trail riding..

This smacks of "all things must come to pass" or some shit, but it's a shame about Chris Cornell ain't it?

GOOD CHRIS CORNELL



and now, sigh... BAD CHRIS CORNELL(and this pains me to post this... but you know, somethings you have to see for yourself..)



ah.. let us not speak ill of the dead, eh?

Being all about interconnectedness and all, thinking about Perfect Circle when I was riding, I began to formulate a long convoluted history linking members of Concord Dawn (both of them actually, thoroughly lovely men) Failure and all that kind of progg-metal-ish stuff. It was going to be awesome. But too long. So here's Autolux


Right...
AN OPEN LETTER TO MR MARK WEIR.

Dr Mr Weir.

Please stop being so superhuman, I respect completely your achievements and
am constantly amazed at your athleticism and prowess in most forms of the sport I love. You pretty much embody all the qualities that I would aspire to have as a rider, and I'm your fan, But come on? second at SSWC08 on a one speed Nomad??
You are making me look bad (Worse). Also, Please will you build me a pump track?

Regards

M Clements



sigh.

And in finishing... It was our third wedding anniversary on Wednesday. Thank you wife for putting up with all my crazy bullshit and expensive tastes. You totally saved my life and I love you very much.



This is another reason why the wife rulz..look at that cake.. made completely by her fair hand.. for Thom. Who was four today.. It's been a good week. Thommo,you are still the best idea we ever had..

East Bay Ray(ment family)

That's the best pun I've thought up for ages, oi.

We're in a house in the lovely Hannah's bay, It feels like the country, and I'm five flat km from the Redwoods.. Lovely.

More soon when brain recovers from the move..

GOOD ON YOU MR HAITCH FOR THE HIGHLANDER and even gooder on you for stopping by with your lovely lady after the race to say high, get cramp in my living room and drink cold cola... Lets come last at the Whaka together, eh?

Homeless in Rotorua (Again)

Ah, Pickles....

Thanks Mick Collins.

It's like that song by the Beatles on Sgt Peppers, although not as lyrical or full of melancholy.And I'm a dude not a chick.

I'm leaving in 2 hours for our new home town..

Bye Auckland. If I type anymore I'll get all emotional.


Then this will happen.

Smokey Rolls Down Thunder Canyon/Tiramasu/If You Don't Already Have A Look/Colossal

Wolfmother are the equivilant of comfort food I reckon... and hey, I'm all about that, right?

Training has gone completely out the window this week, and I'm fine with it. What started out as letting the skin grow back and the movement increase has turned into an ever growing sense of fear that I'm not going to see the Ladies and Thomwah for a little while, so It's been all about spending some good time. ("Honey, I'm just off out for hours doing hill repeats" wouldn't cut it one would think). And I mean, really... I'm moving to Rotorua..

As training jumped out the window drinking jumped in. I've been drunk (and hung over) more times this past week than the last six months.. I should leave town every week I reckon.

Matt K has carved himself a great little niche there, Check the sidebar Matt's Island Bike Life to check out a solid, solid idea..

He's gradually (by dint of telling me repeatedly that these are the bikes for me) got me thinking about newer things and maybe changing my mind from the course I was set upon..I must be awesome to shop people, a cross between Homer Simpson on New Billboard Day and the kid in The Curious Incident Of The Dog In The Moonlight who's food can't touch.
They must fucking love me.

Back to being hungover.. Since I'm now as to all intents of purposes unemployed (until Tuesday) I just sloped around today buying Dirtbombs albums and making Tiramasu. I'm also about to become a landlord, which is somewhat of a frighteningly grown up proposition. Having been in a number of tenanting situations myself I find myself instantly suspicious of everyone, Kinda like when my Daughter will turn up with her first boyfriend, "I know what you wanna do to her motherfucker".. however hopefully my wise mind will win out. hopefully.

Not to come across all hippy like (I support fully what Johnny Rotten said, or I thought I did)But I think if everyone would just listen to Devendra Banhart everything would just be okay, man. You know? like OKAY. I've become a self professed total beard head... I love him.

Speaking of said object of my love...(it's kinda long, but bear with..)



Now for some 'comfort rock'


And lastly, a firm favourite here...

Resting/Flying Goat Dogs.

Still hurting from my crash on Saturday...Turns out I took the impact on the whole right side of my body. Feels like I'm being punched in the arm, hip and leg all the time.So today I RESTED which was rad..I haven't done that in a long time...

I was also swabbed, stuck and tested to all get out. Pre employment checks? Done.

If you really loved me, you'd get me one of these

The metric system is the tool of the devil! My car gets forty rods to the hogshead and that's the way I likes it!!

CATTLE STOP:01

SKIN ON MY LEGS:00
Also, I have a hangover.

Jebus...

I Had A Dream...

That a Dwarf broke into my parent's back bedroom. I got involved in a pretty serious physical altercation with him, I popped him in a choke hold then he tried to smash the back of his head into my nose. I moved my head then picked him up by the nape of his neck and his groin, lifted the pint sized miscreant above my head and then SLAMMED the little fucker onto my grandmothers bed. That knocked the fight out of him!! I went off to get some duct tape to bind his hands and call the police, when I came back my wife had let him go....

Women.

More Weather, Mainly In The Sky.

I've been getting some rides up in, chasing down the hours I lost to the storm...
Did some interval training today.It hurt but it was great and a first, but hey, it was on the programme...The weather closed in during the last ten minutes of pushing back to the red house (YAY). The weather remains closed in. (BOO)

Up until now an interval for me was the time between the last beer being finished and the next one being started. I love learning new things.. aparently these will help me with this speed thing I've been hearing about.

I've heard this thing whereby riders give themselves animal names i.e. clydestales, whippets etc..

This Guy is my spirit animal....

Of Spending Hours Going Nowhere/Sub Tropical Storms

Some called it "the most significant subtropical storm of the decade", others used the more hyperbole-ish/esque term "WEATHERBOMB"

I called it a weekend stuck indoors using the wind trainer when I would rather have been riding. I had some big hours to log and as I like living, decided not to venture onto the storm swept roads.

Mr Haitch and I had planned to ride at yon forest on Saturday. I, being older (I presume) and wiser (?, probably not) made the first move that morning and Txt him along the lines of "this is stupid, my house in underwater, we might die". Apparently he had his phone in hand sending me a message along the same lines. I like the cut of that man's jib (and turns out the forest was closed anyway.something about 130kph winds)...Being the Gentlemen Scholars we are we retreated to yon wind trainers for some, jeez.. words fail me here.. umm boring? stationary? necessary? training. I did get to listen to Black Mountain's sublime In The Future (amongst others)though, so it wasn't all bad. in fact, it was rather good.

And, since I'm all about endurance now I decided to get the full wet weather Woodhill experience by hitting my derailleur with a hammer, pouring a pint glass of sandy mud into my shorts and standing in the cold shower for half an hour.

I'm dead professional, me.



and..some flip side psychedelia.

In The Reeds.

Man, I been gone a long time...

Again, who'd of thought that moving to rotorua would entail more than moving down there and buying a nice shiny new bike??? sigh.

We now live with my parents. boo. I finished the winter series. Yay. The last fifty Km nearly killed me. Boo. I'm doing the highlander. Yay. I'm doing the highlander. Boo. I've got heaps of time to train. Yay. I'm training heaps. Boo/YaY. I'm leaving work soon. Yay. I'm leaving work soon. Boo. I'm leaving my family soon. BOO-URNS! I'll attempt not to go all Get in the van on it. Yay? I've lost my blog flow. boo. Stevil got me thinking about music. YAY!

That Cheered Me Up HEAPS.

More..

I would Marry Them All If They Would Have Me.

If it's not raining it's just about to. Riding bikes in this weather.. marginal.

I've backed myself into a very grumpy corner.

Seasonal affective disorder anyone? oh, look. It's beer thirty.

Janet Weiss can play drums way better than you... James and I both got this album at the same time, and both had the same thought at exact the same time when we played it for the first time (about 20 seconds in). Oh God, Fuck!! My speakers are blown out!!

Our mistake, It's just one of the best recorded albums I've heard Well done that man

Long Time Passing/Sheep Are Counting Me

I never would have thought in my wildest dreams that the process of moving to a place where I can ride bikes all the time would entail so very little riding of bikes.

I’ve been tearing up lino, sanding, painting sorting, boxing things up, wrangling children, helping of the wife, getting of the new job and generally wound all the way up to 11. Yes, you heard it here first… I go all the way up to 11.

In addition to all of this, the onslaught of work continues, it’s strange, I’ve never left a team whereby I’ve been happier, enjoyed the job more, gotten on with my colleagues better and generally had more fun. However, when I consider the lower mortgages, bigger land, amazing lifestyle and employment opportunities the Bay of Plenty seems the place to be...

Here, to be specific.

Yes. Rotorua, ROTORUA. Two lakes. Vegas.

Last race I had down there was fantastic, I managed to beat my time of the first race by 15minutes. I am particularly pleased by this as the course was 5km longer this time… it was a brilliant time, with Obi Wan, Girl Lightning and Red Shorts in attendance, a great day was had by all.

The only thing I could think (well, apart from Gosh, these hills are big) was that the trails that I was apoplectic with joy to ride would soon be my home trails… double YUSS! I found that not blowing my load immediately and riding as hard as I could out the gate was an ideal strategy..

In addition to this, I got a pre ride in the day before (I’m dead pro, me) and rode with some of the nicest people I’ve ever had the pleasure to meet. Rob, Kevin, James, Trent, Kylie, Lisa and Richard: Thanks!


We go in just over five weeks, which means the training for the highlander and Whaka fly somewhat out the window, but needs must. The final instalment of the Winter Series is on 13th July. Should be a blast, training is “minimal” due to the extreme no time that I now have. I’ve gotten a few rides in though, including one yesterday in a thunderstorm. Awesome!

The weather has been royally fucked here recently. I got up to ride at 0530 this morning, heard the smashing of rain on the roof and the howling of the gale force winds and noted the pitch black. I then looked at my tiny commuter light and one word flashed into my head SUICIDE. I went back to bed. It was nice.

Also, I’ve test ridden my new bike… oh yes…soon. Mm… yes.

Lots/I've no idea what I am talking about/Moving//

lots going on. Lots and lots. Pretty much appears we are moving somewhere really cool. Going down to said cool place on Saturday to A) get ready to race and B)Meet with a potential employer and look at houses. Gosh. Training going very well thank you. Hate the feeling of limbo. HATE IT. Brings out my slightly obsessional/projectionist side i.e. displacing nervousness/other emotion by checking something repeatedly. In this case my front disc brake.. Gosh.

Really looking forward to the race on Sunday. Will give a much more comprehensive report this time, as going down with Girl Lightning, Obi Wan and JB. I'll be at the back, thanks!! The course is looking heaps different, and with what I know now, my goal is to do the longer course in less time than the first one...see how we go...

I'm getting a new bike soon!

oh yes. actually two new bikes. OH YES!

You know, I'm a sucker for a blown out SG tone.. and this track (well, album actually) has been stuck on my 'phones during training rides for the last little while... More soon.

Balls like Moots

It's not every day someone expresses an interest, in all seriousnes mark you, to "Drink your blood because I am the lamb of god". Oy. Sketchiest most threatening home visit ever Let's just leave it at that shall we?

In other news, I'm trail riding tomorrow, and maybe we're moving somewhere awesome. Lets just see.

More later.... and now, both to make me feel better and to give props to Matt's flatmate...I give you this!!